Wednesday, December 8, 2010
15 people who irritate me
1. People who say "vade mecum" instead of "reference book."
2. People who claim the Bible is the world's most authoritative vade mecum.
3. People who declare I'm anti-Christian for pointing out that the Bible isn't the authority they think it is.
4. People who think aggressive ignorance is a legitimate point of view. (Especially in matters of global warming.)
5. People who attack a speaker's supposed motives instead of challenging his facts.
6. People who say "he went" instead of "he said" and "he goes" instead of "he says."
7. People who say "I was like . . ." instead of "I thought . . ." or the rest of it.
8. People who say "Me and him went to the park."
9. People who say "Comin' with?" (Unless they're from Chicago. They can't help it.)
10. People who wait until the sales clerk rings up the total before digging deep into their purses for their cash or credit cards. Especially when I'm seventh or eighth in line.
11. People who say "Thank you" to the sales clerk after handing over their money. What?
12. People who take five minutes to tell me what they didn't like about my book before taking five seconds to tell me what they liked. (If they ever get around to it.)
13. Well-to-do people who declare that they'll wait and check my book out of the library instead of buying it. (Students and pensioners excepted.)
14. People who think all books should be free.
15. People who grab you by the lapel and tell you what irritates them.
No wonder I have few friends left. I'm fast turning into Andy Rooney.
(Feel free to contribute your own pet irritations in a comment.)